Just wanted to give a hearty endorsement to Holidays on Ice, which I picked up using another gift certificate from my aforementioned Amazon Visa (apply today!). This book's pretty hilarious. People talk a lot about "The Santaland Diaries," which is a narrative about what it's like working as an elf in a Macy's, but in terms of per capita laughs I think I really prefered "Front Row Center with Thaddeus Bristol," a brief fake review of local elementary school Christmas pageants, which is about what you'd expect:

To those of you who enjoy the comfort of a nice set of thumbscrews, allow me to recommend any of the crucifying holiday plays and pageants currently elicting screams of mercy from within the confines of our local elementary and middle schools. I will, no doubt, be taken to task for criticizing the work of children but, as any pathologist will agree, if there's a cancer it's best to treat it as early as possible.

David Sedaris is well beyond the point where he needs any praise from me, but he's basically our best living humorist. Barrel Fever is very funny, and I'll definitely be using as least part of his excellent Me Talk Pretty One Day in my class next year, as I did this year.

Bitches try, but you can't kill the Rooster.